Seasons of Love Project

My name is Devyn Barraza-Blasingame, nickname Shayla, I am 16yrs old (as of 2017) and was born and live in Sacramento, California.

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I have dealt with depression since I was 9 or 10, and anxiety my whole life. Eating disorders (bulimia and anorexia) started in mid 7th grade. Now I have a huge fear of starving though.  Only depression and anxiety lasted to 10th grade.

 

Cutting was a major coping mechanism for years, alongside it was reading till I had a permanent headache.

 

Day-to-day it was a major setback, I couldn't do certain things trying to hide the scars, I secluded myself so I couldn't get hurt, and I just sunk into my head ignoring everything. I had no truly close friends and still don't as a result from this.

 

I have absolutely no clue what changed to make me who I am right now.

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​[coping with issues now] Ignore it, live in the now, realize none of this matters, I’m never going to see most of these people for the rest of my life so why should I care about what they think of me. The major thing though for me is to imagine my further life, how i'm going to live in 6 or 7 years.

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Writing is my passion, I want to be an editor so I’m constantly reading and analyzing what I read, “Why did the author say this specific thing, why not say it another was?” Therefore every line is important to the story line, chosen specifically for the emotions that set of words make in the reader’s heart and mind.

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My books, my beliefs, these are the major things that keep me going, keep that vision of my future alive.

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Most of my depression was body based, so for me to finally accept myself, and who I am both physically and mentally was a big step in the direction of actually being able to live with myself.

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Make a vision of who you want to be and don't stop until you reach it, there is always something you can do to make yourself happy, because you're worth it.

 

Always.